The only thing that lasts

Hate and you will be hated.

Praise and you will be praised.

Love and you will be loved.

It’s so easy, isn’t it? You can sit there in your soft chair and clickity clack.

Read this

Watch that

Flickity flack.

Why bother? Why do you do anything?

It’s so hard, isn’t it? The struggle you face every day, your life takes so much effort.

If only it was easier. Somehow someone could make it easier.

Maybe your friends could help. Too bad they’ve all passed you by.

Not necessarily.

The friends didn’t pass you by, you left them.

Be a friend and you’ll be friended.

But you stopped answering their calls a long time ago, didn’t you?

And why? For what?

The goal you chase, this race you’re running,

running so fast you’ve left them all behind, all of them.

The race you’re running is over.

You’ve already won.

You’ve already lost.

You’ve got what you wanted, it’s right there in your head.

You have achieved.

Now what?

You should celebrate

Have some drinks, stuff your face, stay up, sleep, roll around in bed.

Take it all for granted.

Hold on.

You’ve woken up dead.

Nobody sees you anymore. You’re a ghost.

And you bang on the window, the invisible wall that separates you from people,

people you love and people you praise and people you hate,

but they don’t see you anymore because you’re gone.

You took it all for yourself, all of it, ate it all up.

You didn’t share a crumb.

And now what is it, what is it that drives you now that you’re dead?

You’ve been forgotten.

You’re less than a memory.

All that’s left, all that’s left, are the people you touched.

Did you touch anyone, while you were alive?

Before your crazy train left the station, before you consumed it all?

Did you share anything? Did you teach anything?

You might not think, but you’d be wrong.

Maybe he swings the bat the way you showed him,

planting his back foot, right elbow cocked back.

Maybe he loves the way you showed him,

holding hands and opening doors.

You don’t last, don’t be so vain.

Names fade into names that fade into names.

Nobody remembers your feelings, they remember how you made them feel through your actions.

You can choose to do whatever you want to do.

The only thing that lasts

is what you gave.

The reward

To succeed, you must believe you can succeed

Belief inspires actions

Before you become

You must do

To become successful

You must do the things successful people do.

You must persist.

Because the walls are difficult to climb

Be grateful for the challenges,

for they allow you to show how bad you want it.

 

Persistence is imperative.

Doing comes before being.

You need to do love

before you feel love.

You need to do success

before you are success.

 

Don’t get confused, intimidated, down.

The walls are a part of the process.

For nothing in life is free

And no great achievement comes

without sacrifice.

 

In the end your reward is not a thing

Things come and go

You’ve earned more, that thing which cannot be taken away,

What is it, after the

struggle?

work?

persistence?

The reward

in the end

is you.

Could be

I chased it around town

And, to my surprise

Caught it quite easily

They tell you it’s supposed to be hard

That you have to bleed and sacfrice and hurt

And chase, and chase, and chase and chase

So I did

And got tired and sick and lonely

So I quit

I threw it all away

And went for a walk

And found it

It was quite sunny, unusually warm for the morning

I picked up a coffee

I walked

Not fast

Not slow

Just walked

And there it was, at the end of a beautiful morning

Sitting on a bench beside the water

So I sat beside it

Here’s what I found

 

Could be

You could be one on someone’s wall

A pinnacle of yourself

Adored

You could be the one they call on and ask

Esteemed

You could be a friend

Trusted, loved

You could be beautiful

A pinnacle of yourself

Your unique you

You could smile

And share your beauty with people who aren’t your friends yet

Could be

Growing, asking, questioning, learning

Or

You could keep it all inside

You could miss it all

And die alone and bitter and sad

You could

Could be happy

 

Are you?

 

Find a patch of sun and lay in it

Frankie’s key to a successful, happy life.

Early morning. Sitting in my chair. Drinking coffee.

Our 3, 5 and 7-year-old sons are continuing the slow demolition of our house. My wife is reading. I’m searching for the end I need to begin with to be a highly effective person.

“Look at that dog,” my wife says. Frankie, our French Bulldog, is laying in the only patch of sun around. Totally at peace. And then it hits me.

The key to a successful, happy life is to find a patch of sun and lay in it.

In order to achieve this pinnacle of success is to:

  1. Find a patch of sun
  2. Lay in it

Do not accept anything less than a fully engulfed, blazing patch of sun. Quality is of the utmost importance. Your life, your success, and your happiness are worth the effort.

Then lay in it.

Do not:

  • plan your future
  • reminisce about your past

You must be. Let the warmth penetrate your skin, feel it in your core.

Now, carry the feeling you feel at this very moment throughout the rest of your life

and be that sun for others.

These things

It doesn’t have to make sense.

The best parts aren’t there.

It’s a hole.

I’m not a poet or a writer

Notice things.

Write them down.

Connect the dots.

Two random things. Connect them.

That’s new.

What to do? What is a writer who doesn’t write? When you stop writing for yourself and start writing for an audience you’ve lost. You write not what you want, but what you think they want. So it’s fake, it’s phoney. It’s seen through, it lacks authenticity. You know, as some might say.

Then.

These things.

Help people.

Help people feel.

Help people feel what you feel.

In that moment. At that time.

Then you have something.

 

I am not a man. I am a machine. Yes, there are chunks of flesh tied to bones but make no mistake, it is a machine.

It thinks. It constantly analyzes the possibilities and selects the course of action which is in its best interest.

Physical pain registers but it is not processed as pain. It is merely an obstruction, an impediment to reaching a goal.

These things.

These things that whirr and click

And do all sorts of things.

 

Stop.

They’re all going to laugh at you.

Who cares?

What if the milk gets spilled?

The entrenched do not want to change. They do things how they do them. You cannot expect to get anywhere towing their line. Line up for your handout, this is what we get paid. That’s what you change.

If you’re doing something different, you’ll know. They’ll tell you. There will be fear. There will be confusion.

How to do it better?

Connect the dots.

How to do it your own way?

These things.

For Sale: Open top child cage (crib) and mattress

I apologize for the blurry first photo, one of them got out and bit my leg when I was shooting. It hurt, I screamed, the photo blurred. There was no time to try again.

For sale is one open top child cage, known to new parents as a “crib.” Survivors, aka “experienced parents,” know the term “crib” to be inaccurate. This open top cage helps to restrict their movements for periods of time. This is extremely valuable at bedtime, preventing them from clawing, scratching, biting you while you try to sleep. You won’t sleep, of course, because of the noise, but you can use this to help get a minimal amount of rest.

The separation afforded by this unit comes in handy for discipline, the thing you pretend/hope will eventually teach them how to behave. It won’t work, of course, but we all have to pretend.

Our cage is in good condition. There are some bite marks which is to be expected. The stickers have been clawed off, for the most part. It’s made of sturdy wood and has the strength necessary to hold when they slam their bodies against it with brutal, savage force.

The cage comes with a mattress. With the mattress, you can feel comfortable knowing when they fall asleep they should be comfortable enough to stay asleep for at least an hour at a time. That’s the best you can hope for, just get used to it. I recommend training yourself to take microsleeps when you’re on the toilet. It’s the only place you’ll be able to get away. You’ll probably find yourself in the bathroom with no recollection of how you got there, not even having to actually poo. If this happens, make sure you flush your fake poo and turn the tap on to simulate hand washing. 7 minutes is all you get. Then take a deep breath and head back out.

We are selling because our youngest can now escape at will. We investigated closed top cage models but there concerns over the legality of these designs. The price is firm at $93 as this is the price of the first hour we were quoted by the therapist, to teach us how to deal with our child’s increased – and our decreased – freedom. Let’s be honest, my wife and I won’t make it in to see the therapist. We will probably fall asleep holding hands and crying in the waiting room with other survivors and miss our names getting are called.

If you are having a baby, prepare yourself. If you know someone who is pregnant, help them by sharing this with them. Actually, don’t share this with them. Buy this for them. They will need a cage. Trust me.

God help us all.

I held love

I don’t have to be that Dad

your tiny fingers danced in the dark
I held your foot in the palm of my hand
body curled up in mine
I stayed still
I held my breath
and listened

I look back now
and see Us there
warm bottle
rocking chair
slowly swaying into sleep

I think of the all times we fought
the things we said
the Beings we’re not
biting, scratching, clawing mad
I don’t have to be that Dad
the future not yet set in stone
a lesson learned before we’ve grown

your tiny fingers dancing in the dark
I hold your foot in the palm of my hand
body curled up in mine
I stay still
I hold my breath
and I promise not to forget
to bite my breath
and listen

Heart 1

 

Originally posted here.

Old Man Strength

Don’t take shortcuts.

I like lifting heavy things.

The gym, you can find me there.

Lots of weight.

Every day.

Warm up. Push weight. Cool down.

Eat. Consume.

Warm up. Push weight. Cool down.

The rhythm builds strength.

 

Old man strength. That’s what I call it. That’s what I want. The fathers, they have this ridiculous strength. They can lift more weight. They can outwrestle. Outlast. I work hard and hope

Warm up. Push weight. Cool down.

I’ll get it.

Warm up. Push weight. Cool down.

Eat. Consume.

Warm up. Push weight. Cool down.

 

Don’t take shortcuts.

 

I like lifting heavy things.

The home, you can find me there.

Lots of weight.

Every day.

Dirty diapers. Do dishes. Bedtime.

Feed. Give.

Dirty diapers. Do dishes. Bedtime.

The rhythm builds strength.

 

Fatherhood, that’s what I call it. I do the things that need to be done. I don’t like doing all of them, necessarily. But my disliking is subordinate to the strength of my purpose.

 

I must lift more weight. Survive. Work hard and hope

Dirty diapers. Do dishes. Bedtime.

I’ll make it.

Dirty diapers. Do dishes. Bedtime.

Feed. Give.

Dirty diapers. Do dishes. Bedtime.

 

There are no shortcuts.

Warm up. Push weight. Cool down.

Lots of weight.

Dirty diapers. Do dishes. Bedtime.

Every day.

Giving yields the greatest gains.

I am the strength of my purpose.

 

I am you

What we are

I am you

There is no me

I am.

You hear me,

And I speak.

You feel me,

And I am here.

You see me,

And I am.

It’s black. Filtered light. Grey. White. The lungs expand, sucking in air. I become alive. The eyes open, taking in the light. I become aware. The neurons fire, recognizing my bedroom. I become human.

I am not I, I am you.

I look toward my wife and become a husband. I hear my children waking and become a father. I build my house as I walk down the stairs. I take it on. I become. I am.

Only without you, I do not exist.

I get into my truck and become a driver. I am not a driver, I am the driver, the one. I are many.

I participate in labor and become a worker. I am. Maybe you know. If people listen, I am called their boss. If people do not listen, they are called my boss. But I am.

If I are you, then we are we, and the table turns on its head. The upside down place. We are here right now, you and I, I and I, we. The mirror lies because it only shows us what we want to see. Go and look. See.

What belongs to I belongs to we. Shared. The language means something. Our lives mean something. But alone I mean nothing. As a we our lives mean everything.

So share. Be kind. Share. Respect. Help.

Because when you do it, you’re doing it for you.

Not because I am I.

But because I am you.